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Tex Commando

I'm not angry, just outspoken

When Mr. T and I went to the food & libations fair a couple of weeks ago, we had the chance to sample some pretty delicious new foods and libations. These are some of my favorite things from that day:

 

I only tried three of these beers on this display. I enjoyed the Breckenridge Vanilla porter, and the Old Chub scottish ale. I hit the jackpot when I went to the local wine/beer/liquor superstore and found those two on the shelves. Except, I had to spend all of my jackpot money on the danmed beer. That shit was expensive for a six pack. I could’ve gotten a case of Budwiser for the same price. Only, I am picky about what beer I drink so if I had a case of Budwiser, I wouldn’t drink it anyway so then I’d be wasting moneyso I’m glad I found the Vanilla Porter. Yay me!

 

If you mofos don’t already know, I really like wine. Like, really. I’m usually not the kind of person who chats people up just to get them to give me things. I also don’t usually use my sparkling charm and good looks to get stuff for free. However, since they gave out tasting tickets (only 12) and the tasting cups were only a sip (how the fuck can you tell you like something from one stupid sip?), I used some of the tools in my arsenal to be able to really ‘appreciate’ their product. Seriously, I wasn’t looking for free alcohol so I could get wasted. Cuz’ here’s the deal – they are there to promote their product. I will buy their product if they it tastes good and I get good service. I bought that shit because I knew it tasted yummy.

I bought/loved some of the foods they had at this place. These amazing chocolate covered pretzels won my heart. My favorite snacky food is The Pretzel. Add chocolate, peanut butter, or caramel to that bitch, and I’m in hevv-vven! As you can see, these things were dipped in chocolate and then rolled in all kinds of good things. My favorite one was dipped in home made caramel then double dipped in milk chocolate. It was like a Girl Scout samoa cookie without the toasted coconut. I suggested that to the owner’s sister who was there, and she agreed that was her first impression too when she tasted that pretzel. I’ll need to check back to see if ‘dem bitches got coconut next time.

Then there was the cheese. Aaaaaahhhhhh, cheese. I do love cheese. I bought some of the best goat cheese I have ever had in my life. It was the perfect mix of stinky feet and cheesy. I didn’t have to drown it in something else to mask the stinky feet-ness of it. I just ate that shit plain. Then later, as a nighttime snack, I fixed a plate of goatey cheese, crackers, sun-dried tomatoes, and kettle corn. The kettle corn felt a bit out of place on my plate of fancy snacks, but the sweetness of the popcorn went so well with the cheese. Brandi informed me that she eats stinky feet goat cheese on Oreos. Ew. Am I the only one who has a problem with this?

I’m getting hungry looking at those pretzels. I need to go make some lunch before I die. It’s a good thing I can’t see the pictures of my new favorite beer right now, or I’d be forced to drink one. But that wouldn’t be a smart move. I have to pick up a kid from school in 30 minutes. They discourage that sort of thing.

 

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