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Tex Commando

I'm not angry, just outspoken

  1. Five year olds are way too candid. In fact, they are embarrassingly candid sometimes. Mine pointed out in the dressing room of Kohl’s that my belly button looks weird, and all the lines on my stomach made it look like a zebra. Then she asked which ones she made. Ummmmm…you didn’t make any because my skin was ALREADY stretched way the fuck beyond natural capacity two kids ago. Thanks for noticing OUT LOUD IN PUBLIC.
  2. Morning coffee is much better with a shot of amaretto in it. I’m not a liquor person. I don’t usually have any liquor around except Bacardi Limon (you know, because diet coke tastes better with a lemon). But, we are going to a party tonight, and I am using up the remaining lady’s fingers I bought for Mr. T’s birthday cake to make tiramisu. I didn’t have any plain rum or Kahlua, so I used the amaretto that was hiding in the cabinet. As soon as I smelled it, I realized that I needed to have some in my coffee. If that stuff wasn’t so syrupy, I’d drink the stuff straight out of the bottle. So, here I sit at 10:22 am with a nice buzz both from all the caffeine and the amaretto. Nice.
  3. Don’t make the copycat Cheesecake Factory Limoncello Torte. You’ll be disappointed. I attempted to make it for Mr. T’s birthday yesterday, and it tasted OK, but looked like shit. NOTHING like the restaurant’s cake. Like I said, I must fix it. However, I don’t really need to have tons of cake, and cream, and mascarpone, and lemon around my house. I’ll eat all of that shit. I love lemon stuff, and I’d eat the shit out if it.
  4. Yesterday I finally blocked a person on Facebook that I’ve wanted to block for some time now. He always posts crazy and super-opinionated right-wing bullshit. Yesterday, he blew me away with his bullshit. I don’t know why I didn’t do it sooner. Methinks it’s time for another friend-scrub.
  5. Speaking of Facebook, some of us mofos have been trying to one-up each other with dinners. I’m pretty sure it started with one of the mofos being passive aggressive, and another one being aggressive. Now, it’s turned into this nightly showoff thing complete with recipes and all. There’s talk about starting a new blog around this theme. I already have some ideas, but I’d love to hear your opinions about it.
  6. The buzz is wearing off now. I must go make the tiramisu now. The custard is sufficiently cooled and the mascarpone is sufficiently warmed. Talk to you mofos later!
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