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Tex Commando

I'm not angry, just outspoken

**8,000,000 points to the person who can tell me what T.V. show that line came from.**

OK. So, this text conversation really happened today. And while I was relating it to Mr. T, I realized that it makes for great blogging. Here goes:

(names have been changed to protect the innocent)

ANONYMOUS PERSON: Oh god, a woman just shit on the floor in walmart. I’m going to puke.

ME: Eeeeeeew!!!!

AP: She was running for the bathroom and didn’t make it. It ran down her leg. I’m stuck in line. I’m trapped and I’m seriously trying not to puke.

ME:Uh uh. Maybe just leave.
ME: Fuckit

AP: Reason #762 why the elderly should be euthanized.
AP: I’m next. And I need the melatonin or my kid will never sleep tonight.

ME: Go to fucking rite aid. Or puke. Whatever. I don’t care. I’m not standing in Walmart looking at someone’s shit
ME: Gross. Take a picture.
ME:  And post it.

AP: I’m not taking a picture of shit. They were cleaning it up, which is the only reason I didn’t run out of there. But it might be a month before I can eat again.

ME: Good. You have put on an extra couple of pounds. A little fasting couldn’t hurt. 😉

AP: Kiss my ass.


I couldn’t make this stuff up! Thanks AP for helping me write my blog. You are the best! 😉


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