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Tex Commando

I'm not angry, just outspoken

Tag Archives: Clitoris

This is a loaded question. The other night, Mr. Tex and I were bantering about his tongue, and I mentioned that my finger works pretty well too. He seems to think that he has cornered the market on multiple orgasms, but I disagree. I’ve gotten pretty good at it.

Not that I masturbate regularly. I wouldn’t even say that I do it occasionally. It’s more like rarely. I can’t even say that I remember the last time I did it. My point is that I do. And that I am pretty efficient at it. If you know what I mean. And I’m not ashamed to admit it.

One time, while chatting it up with some of my Mormon mofos, I learned that some of them never experienced an orgasm. HUH?? These girls had been married for at least a couple years. They all had at least one or two kids.  And they never had the big ‘O’? They wanted to know how to tell if they had  the- ohhh, ooohhHH, OOOOOHHHHHH!!!

Describing how to tell if you’ve had an orgasm is like describing salt.

I suggested they get some quiet alone time, some lube, and ‘discover’ what felt good to them. They needed to explore what sensations felt good to them so that they could tell/show their husbands what they liked. I’m stepping up on my soapbox now and it’s going to get loud because I am shouting with my megaphone, so please excuse me.

HOW THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT TO HAVE A SATISFYING SEXUAL EXPERIENCE IF YOU DON’T TAKE CONTROL OF IT YOURSELF? MEN DON’T HAVE VAGINAS. THEY DON’T HAVE A CLITORIS. WHY DO YOU EXPECT HIM TO KNOW HOW TO TOUCH IT IN SUCH A WAY THAT YOU FIND PLEASURABLE? THAT’S FUCKING UNFAIR OF YOU TO RESENT YOUR HUSBAND FOR NOT SATISFYING YOU. YOU ARE A SILLY CLUELESS WOMAN TO WITHHOLD SEX FROM HIM BECAUSE HE’S NOT ‘GOOD IN BED’. WOMEN HAVE THE POWER TO MAKE THEIR MAN GOOD IN BED. USE THAT POWER!

Brandi had a letter on her blog recently about a woman who ‘endured’ 8 years of sex with her husband until recently when she read some awesome posts about the subject. I believe that there are some really deep issues with Mormons and sex. One issue is that people don’t talk about it. At all. It’s considered ‘inappropriate’. Fuck that word. OK? It’s inappropriate to drown kittens. It’s inappropriate to scream ‘FIRE!’ in a crowded theater if there is not an actual fire. Sex is not inappropriate when two consenting adults are doing it. It’s not inappropriate to talk about it in the context of two consenting adults having it. It’s not inappropriate if you like the way it feels. It’s not inappropriate to think about having it. It’s not inappropriate to want it to feel good. Why should anyone do anything that doesn’t make them feel good while they are doing it? Whether it’s serving someone who is in need or eating a good meal or drinking a good glass of wine or having good sex, life is too short to not enjoy it.

Another issue I have discovered Mormons have is that they don’t ‘know’ what sexual activities are OK to engage in. Is oral sex fine? What about anal sex? What about ‘personal massagers’? Do I have to be lying on my back? We (and I am including myself in this group because, well, I am still a part of the group) are told what to do about everything else, right? How many earrings you should have, how long your skirt should be, whether you can wear tank tops or not, how many (or not) tattoos you should have, what underwear to wear, what you shouldn’t drink, what kind of movies you shouldn’t watch, who you should be friends with-the list goes on and on and on. Is it any real surprise that people don’t ‘know’ what kind of sex they should have? And since it’s ‘inappropriate’ to discuss it, how do they find out if what they want to do is fine? And the circle continues…

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