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Tex Commando

“I'm not angry, just outspoken”

Tag Archives: text conversation

December 1, 2013 “How long have you two been together?”

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When you’ve been BFF’s with someone for years, then have an illicit relationship with them and then end up living together, how do you decide when your anniversary is?

Do you base it on when SHE realized that she loved you?

Or, when YOU realized that you loved her?

Or is it when you told her that you loved her?

Or maybe it was the first time you kissed?  

Or when you told your friends you were ‘together’? But which friend was the first one to know?

But, what about all the friends who ‘knew’ before you did? Do you take that into consideration?

Or is it when you told your blog?

Or Facebook?

Either way, it has been an amazing, difficult, exciting, challenging, enlightening, fantastic , +/- year!

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January 4, 2012 This is a Truuuuuue Story

**8,000,000 points to the person who can tell me what T.V. show that line came from.**

OK. So, this text conversation really happened today. And while I was relating it to Mr. T, I realized that it makes for great blogging. Here goes:

(names have been changed to protect the innocent)

ANONYMOUS PERSON: Oh god, a woman just shit on the floor in walmart. I’m going to puke.

ME: Eeeeeeew!!!!

AP: She was running for the bathroom and didn’t make it. It ran down her leg. I’m stuck in line. I’m trapped and I’m seriously trying not to puke.

ME:Uh uh. Maybe just leave.
ME: Fuckit

AP: Reason #762 why the elderly should be euthanized.
AP: I’m next. And I need the melatonin or my kid will never sleep tonight.

ME: Go to fucking rite aid. Or puke. Whatever. I don’t care. I’m not standing in Walmart looking at someone’s shit
ME: Gross. Take a picture.
ME:  And post it.

AP: I’m not taking a picture of shit. They were cleaning it up, which is the only reason I didn’t run out of there. But it might be a month before I can eat again.

ME: Good. You have put on an extra couple of pounds. A little fasting couldn’t hurt. 😉

AP: Kiss my ass.

 

I couldn’t make this stuff up! Thanks AP for helping me write my blog. You are the best! 😉

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